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tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul

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Author Topic: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul  (Read 88620 times)

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Terri

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Re: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul
« Reply #45 on: January 15, 2007, 08:10:07 AM »

My last baby was two last babies. My twins left in the same year and I would like to blame their leaving as part of my struggle with my weight. I was so not ready for an empty nest. Now, almost 5 years later, I am loving the quiet nights and I have adjusted. Still, there are some days that I wish I could go back and have my little ones at home. I loved being a mommy. Now a mom of 4 adult children, it is interesting. Good times and struggling times watching from a distance, too. My two oldest have graduated with honors from college. My b-baby is graduating this spring and expecting her 2nd baby this summer. This all sounds great and is great. I am very proud of my kids.  My a-baby is struggling with her marriage. Hard for parents to watch. She is a great girl. Has a darling little girl.  Her marriage is such a worry. Her spouse is abusive. It is the difficult thing right now in our lives. I think we have to have things like this to help keep us humble. But along with humbleness comes stress eating. SLD is helping me so much to not do that. Thank goodness for SLD! And thank you Seth!

Terri
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sammie

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Re: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul
« Reply #46 on: January 15, 2007, 08:13:17 AM »

You can do this T-Vix!  You're NOT going to gain it all back, you're going to grieve during this transition of launching your daughter into the world (and perhaps celebrate your parenting job well done, just a bit), and ride out the stress at work, and stick with SLD, and have ups and downs and days of inner brattiness, AND reach/maintain your goal weight.  It's scary as hell, but you're strong and awesome and you can do it all!  Maybe not all on the same day, and not perfectly, but SLD does have your back - and we do too!  If you plateau for a week, or gain a couple of pounds - it's OK, it'll all normalize again.  I get that same panicky feeling, but then I realize we're all still so new to this, we don't have enough experience under our belts (the way Seth and Stephen and other long-timers do) to trust that we may stray and struggle but eventually we'll get back on track.  So here's your first experience with straying a bit, under major life-transition stress - it'll be good to have this under your belt.  You'll ride it through and realize, wow, I always DO come back to Shangri-La.  Hang in there, my dear!!!!!
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girljedi

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Re: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul
« Reply #47 on: January 15, 2007, 06:21:46 PM »

T-Vix, YOU WILL NOT GAIN IT BACK.  Do NOT sabotage yourself!  You have had such wonderful success (see my green!  :mrgreen:), but your inner T-Vix still doesn't believe you will keep it off!  SLD is not like other diets.  If you keep on your program, it will be your safety net.  Don't stop taking your oil (or SW), no matter what happens.  If you have a bad day, just take a little extra the next day.

Keep a picture pre-SLD and a picture of yourself now at work and on the fridge, the bathroom mirror, etc. - anywhere you need to be reminded of how far you've come and how successful you've been.

No matter what emotional stress you are currently under or will be under, you will come through triumphant!  Hang onto that thought and don't let go.

(okay, I'm getting off my soapbox now.....)   :D
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go2grl

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Re: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul
« Reply #48 on: January 15, 2007, 10:37:00 PM »

I think you're right go2grl!  Maybe having the staged goals wasn't a good idea.  I look good (there's a tough one for me to say, but I need to start telling myself it's true) and I feel comfortable where I am.  But I want a little more weight gone.  My inner brat wants to celebrate and keep me here.  With my daughter's impending graduation (Graduations actually.  She's getting her diploma from high school and her associates degree from the community college a few days later.), I'm feeling really stressed.  Add that to some serious project stress at work, and I have the recipe for the beginning of every diet failure I've ever had before.  My mind tells me that SLD will have my back.  But my emotions are screaming at me that this is the beginning of the end, and I'm going to gain it all back.  I'm terrified.

T-Vix

Breathe deep T-Vix!  Sooo much change and stress - but you'll get through all this AND SLD won't let you down.  It really won't!

I had those same terrified feelings after losing my weight and starting maintenance.  You know, the fear that things were out of control if I had a "big" eating day (still smaller than preSLD but...), random terror that maybe all 8 pounds I lost would come back overnight!  But 2-3 months into it I really don't worry anymore.  My weight varies by maybe 2 pounds but always slides back down. I go up and down with my dose based on my whim or my schedule (I try for half the dose I took while losing, but often do less), have less AS but it's all good and pretty smooth sailing. 

So you can give in to the inner brat if you need to, and you can lose more if you want to.  Either way, you can stay at or get to the weight you want.  All you have to do is keep those SLD calories coming.   :)
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David

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Re: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul
« Reply #49 on: January 18, 2007, 01:39:30 AM »

Hi T-Vix,

I can only echo what others have said in response to your concerns.  Keep the order in your life (through the SW or ELOO) and SLD will keep your appetite down.  Remember, that's the great thing about this diet.  We can eat what we want, we just don't want to eat it.

Everything about this diet is discipline and order.  If you can keep that, and make time to take SW or ELOO, then (as girljedi says) SLD will be your safety net. :)

tek_vixen

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Re: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul
« Reply #50 on: January 18, 2007, 08:21:45 AM »

Thanks so much, everyone!  I'm trying to keep my chin up during this slow down.  I am keeping faithful to the oil and fighting my inner brat when she starts acting up.  I really examined my weight loss graph on fitday this morning, and noticed that each of these last three "bump and drops" has had a lower "high" weight.  So I know I'm making progress.  I can hardly wait until it doesn't bump up over 150 anymore.  It feels like I've been hovering at or near 150 for an eon.  In reality, it's probably slightly less than an eon, but you won't convince my inner brat of that fact.  :D

T-Vix
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sammie

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Re: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul
« Reply #51 on: January 19, 2007, 07:14:55 AM »

Thank goodness for fitday graphs!  They've saved my mood many times before too.  Sometimes you really need the visual of that overall trend down, it's very powerful.  It totally makes sense that you'd slow down a bit as you approach your goal - just remember that your slow is everyone else's pretty damn fast!  You and SLD can definitely pass this test.  Good luck grinding on through it, keeping your chin up, and remembering how f*&king fantastic you already look!  You already fit into size 7 jeans!  You're HOT so don't forget to enjoy it!  Big hugs, sammie
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tek_vixen

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Re: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul
« Reply #52 on: January 19, 2007, 08:22:54 AM »

You're the best, sammie!  Thanks for the encouragement.  This was a really rough week overall.  My mood was really crappy, and I was constantly locked in a battle to the death with my inner brat.  I think she won this week.  I'm down only .4 pounds this week.  But at least it is down.  In looking at my calorie intake on fitday, I notice that I am eating more, even though it doesn't feel like it.  I rarely get under 1000 calories, whereas I used to be over 1000 only a couple of days a week before.  I'm not sure whether it's a change in AS or just my fight with the inner brat.  I'm now taking my oil in one dose because I'm OPing in the morning.  But I've also added a small SLD session with my fish/flax oil during the week.  Maybe I should add some SW in for good measure.

In my outside life (I lost a few pounds prior to SLD), I'm only .6 pounds away from hitting the 40 pound loss mark.  But the past month it's frustratingly slow to actually get there.  I don't know why that's so important to me.  It's not like the trumpets will blare and the curtains part and I win what's behind door number three.  It's not like it really matters whether I reach it tomorrow or February 10th or July 18th or never.  It's just a silly milestone.  Why does it matter so much?  What mind game am I playing with myself?  I would stop weighing myself, but whenever I don't get on the scale, I'm guaranteed to gain weight.  Out of sight is out of mind.

Maybe next week will be better.

T-Vix
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lvivianka

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Re: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul
« Reply #53 on: January 19, 2007, 11:19:40 AM »

Tomorrow is another day. we have to be hopeful and optimistic. my weight went down and of course the next day it is up 3, but I do not count the ups anymore. I only count my lowest weight since it is like a yo-yo - constantly tries to upset me. no, it won't upset me since my winter jacket had so much room yesterday I could have hidden a cat or dog in the jacket. I will not buy another jacket until next winter, but will go into the closet and find my one-size smaller items.... :D some day I will fit into "one size fits all", now I call it - one size fits no one. :lol:
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tek_vixen

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Re: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul
« Reply #54 on: January 19, 2007, 01:17:59 PM »

 :lol:

I call it "One Size Fits None".  You're right about being hopeful and optimistic.  It's not really in my nature, although I am trying to change that.  I've thought about it some more, and I think I've figured out why I'm in such a big hurry to get to the end.  Normally, it would be because I'm anxious to be able to eat x or y (whatever I'm depriving myself of).  But this time, I'm not really feeling all that deprived.  My inner brat fights with me I think more to test my confidence that this is a lifelong solution more than really wanting the food she shoves down my throat.  But I think I'm in a hurry because I'm being pretty anal about tracking calories at fitday, and it's really hard for combo foods that don't come in a package.  I have to break it down into its components and guesstimate a lot, which I'm never really comfortable with.  It's fine for some food, but not great for things like reindeer food.  Maybe I need to be more lenient with my tracking and allow myself to make broader guesstimates and be satisfied with that.  I don't want to totally jettison the tracking when I'm at my final goal, because that usually results in weight gain for me.  But I also don't want it to be quite as cumbersome as it seems to be right now.  Thoughts??

T-Vix
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ani

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Re: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul
« Reply #55 on: January 19, 2007, 01:52:31 PM »

T-Vix, I could have typed just about everything in your last post. I've been discouraged lately too, and hungrier than usual, and glued to Fitday quantifying everything.

And like you, I'm not sure what the hurry is. I'm not depriving myself, there's nothing awkward about social events, there isn't a "normal" to get back to. But you're right; all this tracking is pretty tiresome.
 
Also, in my own case I'm just plain antsy. A couple of months ago I was delighted to have lost ten pounds, and I thought I looked pretty good; lately fifteen hasn't felt like enough, and I'm feeling fat and cranky and dissatisfied. I contrast my own impatience with the persistence of Pinkmug, Rose, klgas, et al, and I shake my head at my own nutty sense of entitlement.

It's been hugely reassuring to read about everyone else's experiences with scale bounces. It's true that the low end of the bounces really do keep getting lower, and the highs aren't so high any more. But on a day-to-day level, that's completely obscured by the crazy-looking local fluctuations.
 
As much as I hate it, the tracking has also offered me some reassuring insight into how the cycles work. If I eat a lot more than usual one day, I'm generally less hungry the following day. This is great; it's completely unlike the pre-SLD spiralling appetite phenomenon. I'm not sure I'd have noticed this on my own, but the Fitday reports show it unmistakably: every eight or nine days or so (interesting that it doesn't line up with days of the week!) there's a calorie spike followed by an immediate drop. It also looks like I tend to chug along for a month or so in bounce mode, weight apparently flailing around wildly, and then hit a new low shortly after my period starts.

Without this group's experience and insight, I'd have given up long ago, convinced SLD didn't work for me.
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go2grl

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Re: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul
« Reply #56 on: January 19, 2007, 02:10:51 PM »

:lol:

I call it "One Size Fits None".  You're right about being hopeful and optimistic.  It's not really in my nature, although I am trying to change that.  I've thought about it some more, and I think I've figured out why I'm in such a big hurry to get to the end.  Normally, it would be because I'm anxious to be able to eat x or y (whatever I'm depriving myself of).  But this time, I'm not really feeling all that deprived.  My inner brat fights with me I think more to test my confidence that this is a lifelong solution more than really wanting the food she shoves down my throat.  But I think I'm in a hurry because I'm being pretty anal about tracking calories at fitday, and it's really hard for combo foods that don't come in a package.  I have to break it down into its components and guesstimate a lot, which I'm never really comfortable with.  It's fine for some food, but not great for things like reindeer food.  Maybe I need to be more lenient with my tracking and allow myself to make broader guesstimates and be satisfied with that.  I don't want to totally jettison the tracking when I'm at my final goal, because that usually results in weight gain for me.  But I also don't want it to be quite as cumbersome as it seems to be right now.  Thoughts??

T-Vix

Hugs to you T-Vix!  Sorry to hear it's still hard going.   :( 
You've done SO great - in reality I think the fact that you've only just begun to slow down with 8 pounds to go is fantastic!  Just a thought...what about alternating the days you track your food on fitday?  Maybe chose the tracking days as one with a low calorie intake and let the other days just happen?  Or the other way around if that works better.

It's possible this could slow down your losing a bit - but if it quiets the inner brat then maybe she'll quit trying to trip you up!

Rooting for you!
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TalkingRat

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Re: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul
« Reply #57 on: January 19, 2007, 02:43:46 PM »

Maybe you're at the point where your pattern is changing, too.  I've always been intrigued by the people who report the stair-step pattern Stephen described.  It looks like you could be in a similar pattern, steady weight for a couple weeks, followed by a drop to a new low. 

You lost at such a rapid rate for such a long time!  I lost steadily for only 6 weeks, then went into this odd spiking pattern that took me months to figure out.  Mine's a two week pattern, two trips up and down, the second spike going even higher than the first, before a drop to a new low.  To add to my confusion, every third series had 3-4 spikes.  And when it first started, it began to look like an ever wider spiral upward more than it a 5 week plateau. 

Stick with what has worked for you, and I bet you just discover you are now on a more moderate path to the end.  Sometimes I think those blips are inevitable, and in fact there were times when I fought them and didn't eat any more, and still found myself on the spike pattern. 

Ani mentioned one of my favorite things about SLD:  eating more one day usually means being less hungry the next.  That really helped me to relax, knowing SLD is a tool that isn't about to fail. 

So maybe it's a good idea to relax a bit on calorie counting.  If you're eating new foods, a Fitday guesstimate is probably just fine.  There isn't much danger from an isolated calorie estimate.  An accurate count becomes important more when it starts being a regular food.  When I'm doing something that will add 2 lbs overnight, I usually know the caloric content verrry well.  :lol: 

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lvivianka

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Re: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul
« Reply #58 on: January 19, 2007, 05:00:23 PM »

I am too lazy to count calories. I sort of eat what I want making sure to choose a healthy selection with a little of munching (healthy cold cereal instead of cookies or cake). SLD keeps me away from sweets.  when I took a bite of a chocolate, it was way too sweet. maybe if I counted calories, I could have lost faster, but that's how I am. calorie counting reminds me of the old diets.
   as to weight bouncing, I decided to weigh myself every hour one day - it could be a difference of 5 - 8 lbs, yet I never overate. I don't understand the bouncing, but I am glad there is always a low among the highs (no matter how long it takes). as I said before, it took me nearly 30 years to put it on (was 125 when I got married 35 years ago and now I am 220, so I really have to lose more than 50 lbs - that was just my first goal) and everytime I went on a diet I put on more. this is my lifetime commitment :lol: I will change my ticker now to my real goal :roll:
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sammie

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Re: tek_vixen's progress: in it for the long haul
« Reply #59 on: January 20, 2007, 07:19:13 AM »

Such good advice, as always!  I track on fitday too, and it's been an invaluable tool for learning about how I eat, and when, but I do blow off the days I'm going out for dinner, or to a party, or some such thing.  It's too much of a hassle to figure out the foods I didn't prepare.  And I hate seeing the huge number.  As TR said, you know, all too well, the blow out days, so I blow 'em off.  Then the next day I go back to tracking the good stuff.  Maybe your inner brat is trying to tell you that you need a break every once in awhile?  Or maybe she's just having a hard time letting the holidays go?  Either way, you don't have to fight her, just take her hand, walk her into the corner, and give her a gentle time out.  Take a look in the mirror and remember why you're REALLY doing this - to look and feel great!  Which you already do!  And if she wins, and you salt/sugar/carb out - pop a couple of cinnamon pills or drink a little ACV in water to counter the insulin spike, gently lead her back to her corner, and consider giving fitday a timeout as well!
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